The reality of coming back home!

My very last one... Thank you everyone for reading ❤️

It’s not just something to ‘just taking care of some kids in another country as an Au pair’. Becoming an Au pair means changing your whole life drastically for a small piece of your life. Going away from home, friends and family. Right away just living in some strangers house and even taking care of their kids. You get so much responsibility and this can be hard. You have to be independent and strong. But if you are settled, you will feel so happy in this other country called the USA. We will get new international friends and this is amazing! If you are lucky, you will have the greatest host family which you create such a special bond with. You feel part of the family and you have tons of friends. Besides, you can travel and explore new places you would otherwise new see! But then the down side... or at least partly for me. This down side is called ‘going back to Netherlands after creating a new life in the USA with new friends and my American boyfriend’.  Do not get me wrong. It is amazing to see all my Dutch friends, my family and my farm again. I am so happy to see all the people again I already know for a long time! But still... it is really hard going back home and adjusting to my life here in Netherlands again. You would probably think: ‘why is it weird to go back home again?’ Believe me if I say I have to start my ‘new life’ here again. I was so used to being in the USA, living like an American, talking American English, drive like an American... (well, I’m actually happy I don’t drive THAT bad though! :p) & of course being with my boyfriend. It was so hard to leave him and, because I’m so busy I have a lot of distraction, but still it’s really hard not seeing him on a daily basis anymore. I know we will work everything out, but unfortunately we have to be patient and we do not know for sure when we can be together for good again. This makes life a bit scary, but on the other side I’m also looking forward to it. I’m excited to go through everything with Aidan and become stronger together. I’m excited to figure out how to be together. I’m excited to make everything work and be proud of ourselves. 

I am happy I know I am not the only person that lives in an emotional roller coaster right now. Several Au pairs feel what they call a ‘reverse cultural shock’. I wasn’t really shocked to be back, but felt funny being back. Besides, when I see pictures from my host family, from me with the kids and from California, I really start to miss it again. But of course I feel this feeling. My host family was the best and I literally lived in Vacation Land for 10 months 😻. And before that, I lived near New York City for a year and this is almost everyone’s dream! I have to say that I am very grateful and happy I had the change to be an Au pair in the States for such a long time AND that I lived in 2 of the most incredible places in the country. This of course also made it harder to leave ;) 

If there are any other Au pairs that feel the same way, believe me, you are not alone!